The Construct of Normal Personality

Personality disorders are dysfunctions of our whole identity, tears in the fabric of who we are. They are all-pervasive because our personality is ubiquitous and permeates each and every one of our mental cells. I just published the first article in this topic titled "What is Personality?". Read it to understand the subtle differences between "personality", "character", and "temperament".
In the background lurks the question: what constitutes normal behavior? Who is normal?

There is the statistical response: the average and the common are normal. But it is unsatisfactory and incomplete. Conforming to social edicts and mores does not guarantee normalcy. Think about anomic societies and periods of history such as Hitler's Germany or Stalin's Russia. Model citizens in these hellish environments were the criminal and the sadist.

Rather than look to the outside for a clear definition, many mental health professionals ask: is the patient functioning and happy (ego-syntonic)? If he or she is both then all is well and normal. Abnormal traits, behaviors, and personalities are, therefore defined as those traits, behaviors, and personalities that are dysfunctional and cause subjective distress.

But, of course, this falls flat on its face at the slightest scrutiny. Many evidently mentally ill people are rather happy and reasonably functional.

Some scholars reject the concept of "normalcy" altogether. The anti-psychiatry movement object to the medicalization and pathologization of whole swathes of human conduct. Others prefer to study the disorders themselves rather to "go metaphysical" by trying to distinguish them from an imaginary and ideal state of being "mentally healthy".

I subscribe to the later approach. I much prefer to delve into the phenomenology of mental health disorders: their traits, characteristics, and impact on others.

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Can a Dream Tell us of the Future?

Much has been written regarding dreams and their meanings or purpose. Mankind has been fascinated with our dreams since the first dreamer awoke and wondered about what their visions meant. Since ancient times we have looked to our dreams to find signs of what our future holds. The first written dreams we know of were in 4000 BC. The earliest writings we have on dreams are primarily texts on their religious and spiritual significance.

Most people will spend about one third of their lives asleep. Our dreams are a real part of us but too often they are disregarded. Dreams can give us insight and understanding of our personal lives. They will help us to understand our past, present, and sometimes our future. All we need to do is to pay attention to our dreams and get to know them.

Dreams can hold a message for the future

We have different types of dreams. Often our dreams consist of imagery from our most pressing thoughts and/or personal experiences. Sometimes, however, our dreams can be special. Our dreams can communicate with us if we allow them too. All we need to is listen.

I believe that there are two main types of prophetic dreams.

Those that come to us from our "deeper" self, who is much more aware of certain things than we are on a conscious level, and those who may potentially have come from an "outside" source.

Here is an example from my own dream experiences:

I dreamed of death. All I could remember from the dream was seeing a hand laying in gravels. The most noticeable thing was the ring on the hand. It was my ring. I recognized it without any doubt. Even though this was the only image I could recall from the nightmare I knew that the dream was about a death. I could feel it strongly when I woke up. I had all but forgotten the events of the dream but the emotions were still vivid.

The ring was an Army Boot Camp ring made very similar to a class ring. After I had the dream I never wore it again. Eventually I sold it to a friend of mine who had attended the same boot camp. A few years later I received a call. My friend had been murdered. He was found laying in rocks and dirt with that ring on his hand.

Did my dream forewarn me of this event? I think it is a possibility. What was the dream trying to communicate to me? I had assumed that the dream was about my death. I had also assumed that the ring was somehow a participant in my death. I stopped wearing the ring as though that would prevent the warned death. Perhaps the dream was simply telling me that my friend would die with that ring on his hand.

Whenever we have a dream that we consider to be prophetic or to have a "meaning" we are faced with the difficult task of interpreting just what the dream means. Dream Symbols most often have very definite meanings but these meanings can vary widely from one person to the next. That is why we cannot rely too much on definitions given in Dream Symbol Dictionaries.

In order to understand the meaning of the symbols within our own dreams we must come to a better and deeper understanding of ourselves. We have to learn what these symbols mean to us because that is how our dreaming mind sees them.

Anything within your dream can be a symbol. An example of a symbol in a dream is a snake. A snake can have many different meanings to different people. As with all other dream symbols they can also have a different meaning for the same person at different times in their life. You also have to look at the symbol in the context that it appeared. What other symbols were present in the dream?

The best way to gain a better understanding of what your dream symbols mean to you is to develop your own dream symbol dictionary. Keep as detailed of a dream journal as you can. Don't just write down a narrative of what occurred but record your feelings and emotions too. As you continue to write in your journal and re-read your previous entries you will begin to see parallels with your dreams and your life. Gradually you will be able to recognize what the symbols in your dreams are really saying to you.

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Personality Test: Successful People Have Difficulty Changing

A hard working partner at a major law firm, John B., finds that he gets short with co-workers especially when under stress. He is not viewed as a "team player" by other members of the firm and the support staff avoid him. In spite of feedback and coaching from his colleagues, he has experienced little progress in modifying his behavior.

Judy S. struggles with balancing her personal and professional life, often finding herself overcommitted. As a VP of a large health care organization, she also serves on a number of community boards. She has difficulty saying "No" and feels guilty that she is not doing enough for her children. She has tried repeatedly to decrease her work time but seems to be busier each year.

Both of these successful people may find it difficult to change

There is a "paradox of success," according to the executive coach Marshall Goldsmith, reported in a Business Strategy Review article. This paradox makes it difficult for successful people to grow and improve. When things are going well, people have little motivation to change. Yet, successful people need to change before they have to change or they will plateau or even decline in effectiveness. Even the most successful leaders can increase their effectiveness by changing some elements of their behavior.

Goldsmith has worked with hundreds of executives in Fortune 100 companies and has found that successful people have four key beliefs that drive their success and, often, limit their growth. These beliefs are:

· I choose to succeed. Successful people believe that they are doing what they choose to do, because they choose to do it. They have a strong need for self-determination and do not like feeling controlled or manipulated. They believe that their behavior is a result of their choices and commitments. The "I choose to succeed" belief is highly correlated with achievement. The more we believe that our behavior is a result of our own choices and commitments, the less likely we are to want to change our behavior.
Successful people's personal commitment can make it hard for them to change.

· I can succeed. Successful people believe that they have the internal capacity to make desirable things happen. They do not see themselves as victims of fate; rather they believe that their motivation and ability has driven their success.

Successful people often confuse correlation with causality. Because they get positive reinforcement for results, they may not have an accurate perception of what behaviors drove those results. This can result in "superstitious behavior" where the successful person repeats behavior that they believe was a factor in their success.
Successful people have difficulty realizing that they are successful "in spite" of certain behaviors, not "because of" them.

· I will succeed. A contagious sense of optimism is one of the most important characteristics of successful people. They not only believe that they can achieve, they believe that they will achieve. Because they are ambitious and goal oriented, they have difficulty saying "no" to desirable opportunities. They often equate "busyness" with success. Some successful people drown in a sea of opportunity and burn out their staff trying to complete what they have promised.
Successful people are very busy and face the danger of over commitment.

· I have succeeded. Successful people tend to have a positive interpretation of their past performance. They consistently over-rate their performance relative to their professional peers. When positive outcomes occur, they believe that their efforts were instrumental to the success. They see their history of what they have done as a validation of who they are and their personal attributes.
Successful people's positive view of their performance can make it difficult to hear negative feedback from others.

Goldsmith has found that successful people have great difficulty in accepting input from others regarding their behavior. If the feedback does not agree with their perceptions of themselves they tend to deny the information for three reasons: 1) the input is from someone that they do see as their peer or equal in terms of success, therefore it "doesn't count;" 2) they view input that is inconsistent with their self-image to be "incorrect" and the other person is "confused" or 3) they agree there is truth in the feedback but it could not be important since they are so successful. These are some of the reasons that feedback is not very effective with successful people.

As Denis Diderot once said, "we swallow with one gulp the lie that flatters us, and drink drop by drop the truth which is bitter to us."

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